You’re a little weird

“You’re a little weird.”

I paused on the other end of the phone.

“Um, pardon me?”

“You know, like you are for sure not normal.”

I paused again, unsure if I felt insulted or relieved.

One of the reoccurring struggles in my life, and perhaps something that everyone deals with once in a while, is the realization that not everyone likes you. I wrote about why that is okay, but like any insecurity, it can sneak up on you at the most surprising times.

After I hung up the phone on what would be our last conversation, I was much more bothered by the fact that the comment upset me than I was by the actual comment. I thought I had grown. I thought I had found a confidence in the past year that had finally allowed me to accept, without hesitation, the fact that sometimes people simply don’t get along.

And yet here I was. I felt like a little girl. One that had just sat down and smiled at another child, only to have them promptly walk away. I had gone from “I don’t care what anyone thinks of me,” to feeling about three feet tall.

Maybe this was all coming up because of other lessons I had learned in the past year: I let go of trying to put on a face when I meet new people. I used to mold and twist myself to suit someone, often saying whatever I thought they wanted to hear, which never ends well. Eventually, the real you makes an appearance, and it’s hardly fair to blame someone for falling for a mask, and then being disappointed when you remove it.

So the next lesson, which I feel may never end, will be one of self-acceptance. I look back to a year ago, and I think of the hurdles I’ve jumped through to get to a place where I finally feel like myself.

I’ve changed. You’ve changed. People change. And yes, maybe I’m a little weird. But I’d rather be a happy weirdo, ever myself, than a played down version simply to appease others.

And so with that, I will keep being weird, and I hope you will too.

Have a wonderful week,

Diane

 

 

3 thoughts on “You’re a little weird

  1. I don’t think we ever out grow or fully lose our insecurities. I think we just get more comfortable with being uncomfortable when somebody rejects us, knowing that it won’t last for ever! And, we learn to love ourselves just the way we are!

    Like

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